I love pumpernickel bread. That dark, kinda dry, black German bread. Until I started treatment for breast cancer I had a slice for breakfast almost every day, mostly with Matjes herring and sometimes with boiled egg. And I bought it in vacuum packed boxes, identical to the ones I bought at Whole Foods when I was in the US a few years ago.
Anyway, now that my true taste is coming back, I am back on pumpernickel. And have been amazed to discover that every single pack has at least one strand of my hair on it (on, not in!) because it was clearly at the time of losing my hair that I packed the boxes away.
Now I am delighting in watching my hair grow back, curious as to what colour it will be and what texture (have read that both are likely to be different). One thing worries me though: would prefer if it didn't grow back without pigmentation at first, which I believe can also happen, that is, first grey until the pigmentation kicks in a few months later.
Now enjoy standing in front of the mirror, staring at the strands sticking up on my head. Ja, that is the one exciting thing about having had cancer, watching and speculating about the unknown hairgrowth. Ok, I never went completely bald, only on the sides - which hairdresser Carlos said was cos I sleep on my side - but now it is definately growing back faster. Been almost five weeks since I had my last AC chemo session.
The place where I bought the wig which I have never worn said my length of hair (I went there the morning before my first chemo session) said it would take about three months to grow back. Mmmmm.......
And will I miss my hats? Dunno but doubt it.
I live in Johannesburg, South Africa, where I was diagnosed with breast cancer on Thursday January 15 2009. This is my journey with cancer and other musings as surveyed - initially temporarily hairless - from under my hats.
Showing posts with label hair loss. Show all posts
Showing posts with label hair loss. Show all posts
Friday, May 15, 2009
Friday, February 13, 2009
letting my world know
Posted a message on facebook today saying: "Gillian is waiting for her hair to fall out. Any day now, cos of the chemo. Otherwise fine. Please don't phone." Below that I added this blog address.
Three days ago I addressed a meeting at work - which is a rather formal way of saying I spoke for a few minutes to a meeting of the colleagues I sit around. I kinda barged into the meeting and asked if I could speak briefly, told them I had cancer, was going to lose my hair, had a cap in my bag in case this happened while at work, and this not did mean they were suddenly to stop being horrible to me! "Great!" replied the office joker.
"You're so brave, " said one of my colleagues today after the Facebook posting (she was also at the meeting). Look, I felt far less anxious about going to work with a hat on after I had spoken at the meeting (although it's not the whole office - we seldom have 'whole office' meetings), but hell, I am making these disclosures to make it easier for me. It is going to be hard, I think, to walk around obviously without hair and wearing some kinda headgear to cover it, and generally one then looks a bit half dead, without people around me making it worse - for eg had visions of people at work lifting up my hat and making some kinda facetious comment without realising the purpose of my new style.
Breast cancer is not a disease one can hide. Not if u have chemo and lose your hair. If I had a disease I could endure without the suffering being public, not sure I would tell everyone. Don't know. But this one is going to be public - although sometimes I feel so low energy at night that I wonder how much I will be gallivanting around town. For now, however, still planning on attending at least some of the Dance Umbrella which starts in about two weeks.
Either way, it's going to be obvious that I am "part of the C family" which is more or less how someone put it today after reading my facebook posting. So why pretend it's not happening?
For the rest, I don't have a mouth ulcer as I imagined the other night - think it was a piece of popcorn kernel in my mouth - although my mouth does feel different (someone suggested it was all the mouthwash I am using, as instructed, to avoid the ulcers......) and, thank goodness, still have all my hair. But tomorrow is day 10 since my first chemo treatment and that's the day two people have said is when it happens. The doctor said between week two and week three after the first treatment. So guess this close crop is not for long..... pity.
And generally feeling ok, apart from what was literally about two minutes in the late afternoon of dizziness and nausea. Let's hope this lasts.
Ja, don't think I am being brave - gosh, Sunday is a month since I was diagnosed with cancer so it took three days short of a month for me to declare it to my little world.
Three days ago I addressed a meeting at work - which is a rather formal way of saying I spoke for a few minutes to a meeting of the colleagues I sit around. I kinda barged into the meeting and asked if I could speak briefly, told them I had cancer, was going to lose my hair, had a cap in my bag in case this happened while at work, and this not did mean they were suddenly to stop being horrible to me! "Great!" replied the office joker.
"You're so brave, " said one of my colleagues today after the Facebook posting (she was also at the meeting). Look, I felt far less anxious about going to work with a hat on after I had spoken at the meeting (although it's not the whole office - we seldom have 'whole office' meetings), but hell, I am making these disclosures to make it easier for me. It is going to be hard, I think, to walk around obviously without hair and wearing some kinda headgear to cover it, and generally one then looks a bit half dead, without people around me making it worse - for eg had visions of people at work lifting up my hat and making some kinda facetious comment without realising the purpose of my new style.
Breast cancer is not a disease one can hide. Not if u have chemo and lose your hair. If I had a disease I could endure without the suffering being public, not sure I would tell everyone. Don't know. But this one is going to be public - although sometimes I feel so low energy at night that I wonder how much I will be gallivanting around town. For now, however, still planning on attending at least some of the Dance Umbrella which starts in about two weeks.
Either way, it's going to be obvious that I am "part of the C family" which is more or less how someone put it today after reading my facebook posting. So why pretend it's not happening?
For the rest, I don't have a mouth ulcer as I imagined the other night - think it was a piece of popcorn kernel in my mouth - although my mouth does feel different (someone suggested it was all the mouthwash I am using, as instructed, to avoid the ulcers......) and, thank goodness, still have all my hair. But tomorrow is day 10 since my first chemo treatment and that's the day two people have said is when it happens. The doctor said between week two and week three after the first treatment. So guess this close crop is not for long..... pity.
And generally feeling ok, apart from what was literally about two minutes in the late afternoon of dizziness and nausea. Let's hope this lasts.
Ja, don't think I am being brave - gosh, Sunday is a month since I was diagnosed with cancer so it took three days short of a month for me to declare it to my little world.
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