Tuesday, January 24, 2012

"I don't have an option"

I am planning a change in my life. Nothing to do with my health, nothing I can write about at this stage. But I am making it my focus: reading an expert book on the topic, going to see a life coach to help me achieve my goal (a bit dubious re whether or not I will actually go through with the appointment as I am not sure I believe in life coaches, preferring psychotherapy for solving problems) and so on.
A friend congratulated me today on making the effort (she has a motivation problem, period...) and I heard myself say: "I don't have an option".
I remember saying that before, I said smiling.
When I was having treatment for cancer, many people said to be how brave I was, how whatever I was, how ... I used to get a little annoyed as I wasn't being brave, wasn't having a good attitude or blah-blah-blah. "I don't have an option," I'd say. And mean it. "I am just doing what I have to do."
Same with this.


  1. Hi Gillian,

    I hope the path you take goes as well as your cancer journey has gone. I have concluded from reading your blog that you are an enormously strong person.

    1. well well well... mm.. thanks for that comment but I am not so sure.... been stressed a bit lately (not health issues) and haven't been sleeping that well but thanks for the comment. Maybe I am strong but what I definately am, and this is not a good thing, is intolerant towards those who fall apart and seem unable of dealing with a situation. I seem to know many people like that and I don't have much empathy. I understand the difficulty but they must get on with things. We all have to....

  2. Good for you. I'm feeling a bit that way myself right now. I'll be curious what you think about the life coach if you go. Not really sure what I think about them either.

    BTW, your hair looks great!

    1. Thanks for the compliment re my hair. I am ready for a major revamp re my hair. Am wearing it tied up every day - it's boiling hot here - and feel that I may as well cut it all off then. Also don't like the blonde highlights over my own naturally dark hair when tied up... looks better when it's loose. Aah, what bliss to have such mindless worries!!!!