Feeling drained. Had two major scans and the stress was all-absorbing. Well, terrifying. Today, waiting for the doctor to come do the ultra-sound, post the mammogram was .. well, the minutes dragged as I wondered why he was taking so long to read the mammogram. Luckily all was well. Very luckily. The thought of having to start treatment all over again, which in my case would also have meant a masectomy, was just too much. So grateful. Then mistakenly threw my cellphone into the toilet at the oncology centre, dunno how that happened but clearly a hilarious and annoying part to a day filled with gratitude.
On Friday had a muga scan, which checked my heart in terms of the rate it emits. This included a scan of the heart. Luckily that too was all in order. Had the test cos all the treatment I have had - the A/C chemo, radiation and now herceptin, can affect the heart so before I even started treatment had a muga to set a base rate. That was 71. This time was 65. Not unexpected after a year in which I wasn't allowed to exercise for about five months (I did low energy exercises and yoga), followed by months in which I not only had to build up stamina but am now not allowed to do more than 15 minutes of moderate cardio.
Was pretty horrified today when the doctor said I cannot do more FOR THE NEXT FIVE YEARS! But I can go for a long walk, he said. Thought that would be cardio too.
Had herceptin today and was starting to feel funny tonight, so been popping panados.
Oh, The Tango Man, unlike his head nurse, said it is possible to feel bad on herceptin, that everyone responds differently.
Feeling depressed tonight. Think it's the aftermath of all the stress. Not depressed. Just not on top of things. Well, I am on top of things. Am so grateful. Really. Just think might get into bed and take it easy.