Tuesday, May 26, 2009

what i don't like about having/had cancer

What I don't like about having/had cancer is the constant array of side-effects, no matter how minor. "Oh did u get nauseous?", "Oh, but your hats look nice on you" people say as if the only things u feel,the only drawbacks are the nausea and the hairloss. Bullshit. Well for me that's bullshit, those were the minor-ish things.
Right now - and think I am six weeks post chemo, week two of radiation and my cancer (the two cancerous lymph nodes to the left of my left breast) has disappeared - and I feel the following:
1) a sore throat - could be throat thrush, could be panicky shallow breathing, could be a sore throat caused by the radiation. Seeing the dr tomorrow and will find out;
2) the beginnings of a mouth ulcer
3) somewhat sore hands and lower arms where the chemo burnt my veins;
4) - oh well, that's it.
And that's enough too. A little tired too but not too much. In fact, agitated cos have to be there (radiation) early tomorrow (I changed my 4pm appointment to give me more time for work) and the time's flying and I still want to read.
So guess I'm ok.
Oh and I am very fat. Getting fatter by the second. So bought cake for one last binge. Apple strudel and petit four.

PS: 10 MINUTES LATER: NOW FEELS LIKE HAVE ULCERS IN MOUTH, WELL BUMPS. SO GUESS IT'S THRUSH AND YELLOW EMULSION HERE I COME ... LIKE HELL, WILL START TOMORROW

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