My dear friend Zilla in Australia, a former colleague from way back, offered to send me this book about breast cancer, apparently a hit in that country. Written by copywriter Domini Stuart, just leaving the book lying around helps as the title "You can get through this!" written in a bold and large typeface, reinforces such a positive message.
Anyway, besides being very well written and an easy read, quite a few things she had to say astounded me, not least her view that one does not need all the facts.
In a chapter titled "You don't need a medical degree to survive" Domini writes: "Do your homework - but only if u want to" and then goes on to say:
"My surgeon told me that one aspect of my treatment had been influenced by a recent study. When I mentioned this to a friend, she was astounded that I hadn't asked for details of the study so that I could read it for myself. She would have wanted to. I msot certainly didn't.
"As far as I was concerned, my team understood the significance of the findings a lot better than I could ever hope to, and they were a lot better placed to decide whether the treatment was appropriate for me. This was all I needed to know."
I agree with Domini. As much as on occasion I think The Tango Man has not told me enough, I have not asked for a prognosis for example as I don't want to know - I am going to get through this and that is all I need to know. Whatever he tells me to do, I do, which is for someone who doesn't take instructions well and is in the information game is quite something - but then, I respect him which is more than I can say for some people who give me instructions.
Oh, and as for the internet, which she also warns against, I know from the past, ie pre-cancer, that when it comes to medical things it is very easy to come with research which convinces you you are dying. So for cancer, the recommended site is
http://cancer.org which is the site of the American Cancer Society. Explore it, it is a useful source of all sorts of information.
And yes, as much as my world has temporarily shrunk and I am getting used to feeling kak-ish as the normal ok-ish: Yes, I will get through this!