wonder how one stops worrying

People keep saying I look well - I suppose I look better than when I was on chemo but how do I know I am ok? When I got diagnosed, I felt better in all senses - physically and mentally - than I had for years yet I had breast cancer.
Now I don't feel as perfect as I felt then, thanks to side-effects from the medication I am on. The herceptin and tamoxifen combine to make me a little tired, well, pretty tired, especially stamina-wise, the herceptin makes me feel spacey at times and the tamoxifen gives me horrible hot flushes.
Would hate to have the cancer return. That's why I am taking herceptin and tamoxifen but they are not 100% foolproof.
My friend Tania's mom died of cancer on Friday but guess her circumstances were very different.
Would love to know how others feel on herceptin. I was told there were no side-effects until I started having them, The Lymph Lady told me about how most of her patients feel on it, and the oncology centre finally acknowledged that what I was feeling was legit and expected (except for the mouth ulcers which they claim is not from herceptin).

here we go round the mulberry bush....

Enjoyed my little overnight jaunt at Quiet Mountain Lodge in Magaliesburg. In fact, at first it was so quiet and so tranquil, that it was almost too quiet. Time passed so slowly. Then I grew into it. And the food was great. Think I would go back although don't always have the money for such get-outta-town jaunts.
But the night before I left got miserable. Could feel the little bumps in my mouth. Had a sore on my lip and it became oral thrush. Same as before, with chemo. From what I have read, it's from the herceptin I am taking. Damn damn damn.
So back to using what I used to call The Yellow Gunge. Hard to believe but still have it. Was about to ceremoniously/unceremoniously (was still deciding) chuck it all out, and now this.
Will be phoning the oncology centre tomorrow morning, before I see The Lymph Lady, and before I fly off to Cape Town for a week (will not be blogging while away). Just hope it's ok, that my immune is not too down and can still fly.
Plus, my arm has been sore. Not sure if it's from radiation or lymph hassles which the radiation caused, but all in all had a sleepless night last night (exacerbated by the coffee, if not caused by the coffee).
Look, not as bad as it all sounds and writing it down like this does help, but it is nevertheless disheartening to jump back to side-effect symptoms I had thought were well behind me.
Oh and munching raisins as I write. Diet from tomorrow.